Saturday, February 4, 2012

Blunt Wit

Absurd musings on life, the universe and nothing

Are you a sock person or a shirt person?

Posted by JD On May - 27 - 2008

Today I am unveiling a new classification system for individuals based on rigorous scientific study, deep spiritual contemplation and keen social observation. Everyone, and I mean everyone, falls into one of these two camps: Shirt People or Sock People.

This is serious, just hear me out. Sock people are one of a pair. They must find their match and be worn together. Shirt people, on the other hand, can easily go solo although they don’t mind being on top or bottom with another shirt as the case may be.

Sock people go their whole lives with a bad case of static cling. They find their match and, come hell or high water, stick to him or her. If they don’t wash after a couple of days they start to smell. On rare occasions, they come out of the dryer without their matching pair. It is one of those grand mysteries of life … where the other sock disappears off to. In fact there has been speculation of a mystical sock graveyard – akin to the mythical great elephant graveyard – where single socks go to die alone. They can be loud and garish, especially during holiday seasons, but are more naturally toned-down mono-chrome.

Shirt people are more solitary by nature. Give them an undershirt and they’re happy because the undershirt gets dirtier. They also don’t mind being covered by a jacket if it’s sexy or cool. But their natural state is just hanging out, chillin with their friends. They can be garish and loud or quiet and subdued. They can be pull-overs or all buttoned up. Oh, and they love to be ripped off if physical contact is involved.

So which are you … a sock person or a shirt person?

29 Responses

  1. Savannah Said,

    a naked person, dammit.

    Posted on May 27th, 2008 at 6:23 pm

  2. JD Said,

    ah, so no socks or shirts ….. nice

    Posted on May 27th, 2008 at 6:24 pm

  3. Maggie Said,

    This was just as good the second time around as it was the first….

    And yep, I’m STILL a shirt!

    So I don’t recall what your answer was….are you a sock, or a shirt?

    Posted on May 27th, 2008 at 6:46 pm

  4. JD Said,

    oh, i’m an avowed sock person ….

    Posted on May 27th, 2008 at 7:03 pm

  5. ripped offed~ Said,

    Ahh…i am a shirt dress ….with lots
    of white buttons…………

    ripped offed~

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 12:16 am

  6. JD Said,

    ah poor dress. you should be more careful …

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 12:19 am

  7. Pages tagged "blunt" Said,

    [...] tagged bluntOwn a Wordpress blog? Make monetization easier with the WP Affiliate Pro plugin. Are you a sock person or a shirt person? saved by 17 others     Stormwolf100 bookmarked on 05/28/08 | [...]

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 8:08 am

  8. shades Said,

    By the time my wife was a freshman at Clemson in class with the Fridge he was not crabbing his classmates. Who knows what he had graduated to by that time. Othe nefarious modes of torture, no doubt.

    And I’m more of a fried chicken person. Actually pretty much of a fried anything person….followed by a long bike ride.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 8:41 am

  9. JD Said,

    i hesitate to think what he might have been doing by then … lobstering?

    ah and i used to road bike ride until i hit a bmw at near full speed and injured myself. now i mountain bike exclusively.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 8:49 am

  10. Tina Said,

    I’m a shirt person love shirts socks get on my nerves but have to wear them in the winter and i wear the ankle socks.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 9:35 am

  11. JD Said,

    ah an unabashed shirt person …

    don’t be hard on us socks!

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 9:36 am

  12. Pentad Said,

    Heh. Funny! I’m definitely a shirt/blouse person.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 9:43 am

  13. JD Said,

    ah, wundabar

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 9:47 am

  14. Jenn Said,

    I am apparently a shirt person– And hopefully in a tasteful neutral shade. :)

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:09 am

  15. JD Said,

    tasteful

    that sounds

    oddly

    suggestive

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:09 am

  16. ripped offed~ Said,

    Ahh i so agree with Tina.Ii only wear socks
    when working out..my tootsies are claustophobic.
    When it is ~15 here in the winter and i am in my sandals; I often get women trying to be my
    momma….where’s your shoes? …and socks? Wonder if you break down? I inform the I already have a momma and am a momma…course I keep work out shoes in car so if i break down my sweet feet shall not freeze….
    Why do women want to momma others..that are not their kids. I’ll think on it and get back to you on that one. lol………They want to control the world.

    ripped offed.

    Yes~I’ll be more careful about whom i hang out with. Can’t afford to loose any more buttons off my shirt~

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:34 am

  17. JOsie Said,

    I strive to be a sock person who maintains her shirtness…

    But so far I’m still butt nekkid.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 12:51 pm

  18. JD Said,

    maybe you’re an underwear person?

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 12:52 pm

  19. Pamela Said,

    I’m a shirt person! I’m chill, sometimes too chill

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 7:24 pm

  20. JD Said,

    that sounds cold!

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 7:52 pm

  21. Dave Said,

    I must be naked too cuz I do not think I am a sock person or a shirt person.. I think this whole blog is a little ridiculous but I love it anyway :o )

    Keep it up JD..

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:04 pm

  22. JD Said,

    ridiculous is my middle name

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:06 pm

  23. DrowseyMonkey Said,

    Okay, that’s so crazy it makes sense! lol I think I’m a shirt person.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 10:58 pm

  24. Jillian Said,

    I think I’m a shirt person, of course this sucks for the sock-guy I married.

    Posted on May 28th, 2008 at 11:42 pm

  25. Dark Angel Said,

    I’m the sharpest sock in the drawer!

    Posted on May 29th, 2008 at 8:20 am

  26. JD Said,

    poor poor sock guy

    Posted on May 29th, 2008 at 8:35 am

  27. Elizabeth Said,

    socks….my spouse has probably in the neighborhood of upwards of 150 pairs of socks many of which are agyle and some of which closely but don’t quite resemble the one you are trying to match it with.

    So, I prefer to be barefoot but always wear a shirt.

    I know, that isn’t helping you at all.

    But I feel like I’m not dressed if I don’t have my watch or earrings on. Consider and discuss…maybe its a security thing.

    If not for my situation the answer would be socks, mismatched but close.

    Posted on May 30th, 2008 at 12:08 am

  28. JD Said,

    lol

    all socks are a bit askew

    and i’m your mirror opposite … disliking watches, earrings and the like …

    Posted on May 30th, 2008 at 12:24 am

  29. washwords Said,

    great post. Hmm, i thought I was a sock, then learned I was regretting that I never had a chance to be a shirt, so I did that and thought it was fine! thought maybe i’d keep doing it forever. until i realized: i’m a sock.

    Posted on June 8th, 2008 at 12:36 am

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