Blunt Wit

So if you have never heard of CL or Craigslist then you are probably not of this earth. I even heard whispered they are currently in the process of setting up a CL for the moon, although the only listings so far are a few used golf balls and a couple of old tattered flags.

Contrary to popular wisdom, CL was not founded by Jenny Craig, the uber-dietress, as an online swap mart for plus-sized clothing. No it was started by Craig Newmark, a Jenny Craig devotee no doubt, whose primary motivation was to access erotic services at rock bottom prices.

But of course you know CL is so much more than a cheap call out service for sleazy strumpets. You can make actual platonic friends, find your very own best friends with benefits and buy used stuff. In fact CL has almost single handedly put the newspaper classifieds and exotic call girl operations out of business.

So, recently I entered the market for a mountain bike. As you know I am frugal (a nice way of saying CHEAP), so I found the (used) bike of my dreams on CL. It was a brand-spanking new Trek 8500 that had only been driven by a little old Grandmother to Church on Sunday mornings. I arranged to meet her at a local pick up joint (Home Depot). At the appointed time she didn’t show.

Stood up!

How dare she!

Later when I reached her on the phone she said her husband had vetoed the sale.
“Well, then why did you put it up on Craigslist if you weren’t interested in selling it?” I perplexedly queried.
“I thought it would be fun.”
“Ack,” as I coughed up a hairball.

My estimation of CL took a major hit.

Then, a month or so later, tired of the incessant extortion at the gas pump, I decided to invest in a (used) scooter for puttering around town. I located the perfect bike – sleek, fast and cheap. This time I asked the owner 40 questions to establish general sanity and we agreed on a price and a time the next morning for me to swing by pick it up. Wouldn’t ya know, I drove 45 min to her house and she wasn’t home, or at least wouldn’t answer the door after much ringing, knocking, cursing and screaming.

Damn!

Stood up yet again!

I guess the only consolation was that I hadn’t been calling folks in regards to erotic services … that would have really sucked.

Have you ever been stood up?
Have you ever used CL?

So I got to cogitating the other day about blogs and blogging. I realized this phenomenon has become more than just a passing fad. I tried to distill the greatest benefits of blogging to mankind in my own mind. I got it down to two lofty contributions.

First, blogging rights the wrongs in society and makes the world a better, happier, and most of all, safer place. By the miracle of technology, bloggers transform into enlightened gadflies to the refuse of society. They make paparazzi look noble. I mean, I know fer sure that I am so much better off seeing that Britney’s pet cocker spaniel “Longfellow” threw up on her Manolos.

The other key benefit to blogging is commerce. Sites like eBay and Craigslist simply just don’t cut it – too big and impersonal. Bloggers, on the other hand, build quaint havens away from the crowds. Like little virtual corner stores of old. They have the distinct advantage of knowing their audience and their most intimate desires.

For instance, I know many of you are car buffs and thus I have decided to present you with a unique opportunity to buy my car.

This ’65 Chevy is a beaut.

I bought this screamer from a Grandmother who only used it to drive to church on Sundays so very low mileage. She runs great! And since windshield and windows are missing no need for air conditioning which just lowers your gas mileage anyway. I’m listing her for $999 but am willing to negotiate.

So tell me, what do you see as the biggest benefits of blogging?